Interviewed and written by Aaron Robinson – Editor
“I practice what I preach, I decided to make this [educator/therapist] my mission and help others overcome lots of shame and educate them to different forms of love and relationships from spiritual and mental, to physical emotional forms of bonding,” says Dr. Ava during a recent interview with Consciousness Magazine, explaining why she took an interest in wanting to become a sexologist after going through difficult relationships in her life, as well as, wanting to learn how to find love and keep it. As of today, she has been married for over 20 years.
Dr. Ava is the founder of the Loveology University and one of Hollywood’s favorite love and sex therapist who cover topics such as love, relationships, sex and intimacy. Having a positive message, she has influenced and engaged thousands of people in numerous countries, advising and offering ideas on how to help keep a relationship healthy and together. She shares several of the 10 tips that are essential when forming a fantastic relationship that all begin with the powerful letter C, as well as elaborates on two major downfalls in a relationship, a lack of communication and chemistry. “Communication is the key ingredient for a successful relationship. If you don’t have open and honest communication, it’s going to falter. Now the next one is chemistry. We all know what chemical attraction is when you meet someone, even that can fade if you don’t maintain it. You want to find areas of mutual impact, whether it’s dancing, hiking or painting together, but fostering the areas of your life where you have good chemistry.” The relationship specialist continues to share her knowledge on tips to a fantastic relationship that begins with the letter C. “There’s curiosity, and as soon as you lose curiosity with your partner the relationship is going to demise. So we have to constantly be curious about what our partner is doing or wants to do.” Other C’s she shared are collaboration, creativity, consideration and contribution.
As a great believer in adding creativity and artistic practices in a relationship, the relationship expert gives advice to married couples and couples in a relationship in hopes to keep their relationship renewed. “I think creativity is all it takes because you love each other and you probably are best friends. Maybe the little passion isn’t always there. Try new things; take turns being responsible for bringing creativity into all areas of your date life and outside of the bedroom. There are so many things that fall under creativity, even touching your partner six different ways is creative. The first way is the healing touch. Maybe you will give them a scalp massage or a foot massage. The second way may be a friendly touch when you hold hands when you’re walking. The third way will be a romantic touch when you kiss, an essential touch, a sexual touch and an erotic touch. You can be really creative… mentally and physically and sexually too.”
Over the years Dr. Ava has become an accomplished author, writing several books. Her new book The Sexy Little Book of Sex Games shares numerous playful adult games for couples to make you laugh, talk and connect with one another. A lot of games require a lot of finances; however, all of the games mentioned in her book are free. “Every game in my book is completely free. I mean that’s the good news. There are kissing games, those are totally free. (Laugh) You just have to kiss your partner with as many different techniques that you can think of. That’s a game right there, there are games that you can use for free. You can use a piece of ice on your lover’s body. I have some great little tricks to staying cool. One of them is to use ice on your partner, on their erogenous zone. You can start a romance journal together. That’s creative. It’s something you can do together.”
One of Dr. Ava’s favorite games is called The Passion Wheel. It’s where the couple will both draw a circle and then divide it up into 8 to 12 parts. Each will write on the parts of the activities that they want to do to enhance the relationship. She gives an example. “For example, the woman may write cuddling, the man may write kissing, then the woman might write massage. And the man may write oral pleasure and the woman might write bubble bath. You both get your needs met. It’s creative. It doesn’t cost anything, but it’s valuable because you’re putting your time, your energy into enhancing your love life. I’m always about coming up with things that are not expensive, but are still very valuable.”
Over the course of Dr. Ava’s career, she has lectured for Fortune 500 companies, religious organizations, medical institutions, colleges and so on. She is a certified hypnotherapist, a certified AASECT Sex Counselor, and a Continuing Education Provider for the California Board of Behavioral Sciences and California Board of Nursing. She also educates on the awareness of safe sex and the importance of protection as well. “I often recommend people to have what I call a condom fashion show. Get as many condoms as you can and practice putting them on their lover in creative ways just to make it sexier, more fun and playful, but still safe and find out what condoms feel the best, also the same for lubes. Get a lot of different kinds of lubes to see which ones are the most erotic. So again, that adds to the creativity, but you’re also practicing safe sex while you’re making love,” explains the global speaker who believes in the philosophy of strengthening spirituality and the betterment of mankind.
Dr. Ava’s background consists of her earning a doctorate in Human Behavior from Newport University, CA., and doctorate of Education in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. She shares advice to those who are seeking to later become serious in hopes of making their relationship last for years. “You gotta do everything that happens in your life with your partner as a collaboration. A lot of people are very selfish. They think they want a relationship but they really don’t. You know, they are just the ‘me me people’. A successful relationship can only be with two givers, you can’t have one giver and one receiver because the giver will run dry. And an exercise that I give is to write a couple’s mission statement that includes your values and your goals and place it in a prominent place so you both can see it each single day. And those couples usually have a longer lasting relationship because they have something really tangible to look at.”
Dr. Ava is also the spokesperson for The Experience Channel (http://theexperiencechannel.com), which is a website that features TV Shows, offers articles with advice, games, kits such as the Fifty Shades of Grey, and much more. She concludes the interview. “I think you have to have fun…playfulness. It’s really important to laugh together. I recommend tickle wars, pillow fights and gentle naked wrestling. And do go to The Experience Channel, it’s original programming for single couples, for gays, for straits…everybody. And just know sex is just one of the most beautiful gifts that you can give to someone who is worthy.”
For more information about Dr. Ava Cadell please visit http://dravacadell.com
Last modified: May 14, 2023